In the summer of 1986, I was particularly taken with a young woman with attitude called Madonna asking her papa not to preach. I thought she was the bees knees. On watching her video, presumably on Top of the Pops as this was in the days pre-MTV (it’s hard enough to remember when MTV played videos, let alone when we didn’t have it at all), my mum tutted loudly with disapproval. I took real umbrage at this; how dare she tut at my new heroine?!

When I asked Mum why she was tutting, I do not remember exactly what she said but I am sure she would have called her either vulgar or common (her favourite insult).  When pressed for a little clarification, it became clear that the source of the problem was not (necessarily) that the song was about teenage pregnancy (although in hindsight I realise this might have got up her nose a bit).  Nor was it the fact that she snogs the face off the delicious and grubby looking Alex McArthur (although again, this may have had something to do with it!  Also, I really had a major 10 year old’s crush on him.  Swoon!).

The problem was the shirt she was wearing in the video.

I remember being very surprised and confused by this. I remember vehemently defending Madonna’s pride in her Italian heritage. I remember saying to my mum ‘It just means that she thinks that Italians do things better, in general.” I remember not really understanding what my mum thought it really meant.  I remember thinking I knew best (something that still happens, unfortunately).

Innocence is understanding the concept of teenage pregnancy but not really understanding exactly how it happens. And not knowing what ‘doing it’ means. Sadly, Madonna’s shirt will remain an untested hypothesis as far as this blogger is concerned.